Currently – 6/27/19 (Published, Elated, Forward)

So… I guess I’m finally a published author. Well technically I’m not in the sense of my actual name. I used a pen name to protect my identity. And the process will take almost three days before the thing is posted and up for sale… But ya, I finished and am currently going through the process of publishing a paper.

This is cool. This is really cool. Sorry I don’t have much else to say other than that but I am really happy, for the first time in a while. First person I told was my friend and she was pretty happy for me. Not only that but she seemed to be really happy herself, in her life that is. We didn’t get to talk much but it was really nice to not only get to finish this but also to get someone who is genuinely happy I’ve done this.

I’ve been watching Netflix pretty much nonstop from then. I finally broke myself away from that “Just one more episode” thing to play some games. But then I had a thought pop into my brain. Why just stop here? I mean I don’t feel like I need to unwind so… why not put in some more work to write something else? I was just about to head out to get my own personal writing ritual before I decided to write this down. Just some garbage fast food that will force me to sit down and actually write for a bit instead of stopping as an excuse.

I think I’ve been stretching myself too thin. I keep trying to make like these extremely long novels. It would probably be better if I did a smaller short story just to get in the mood or make this feel a little more possible. I’ve got some ideas but I really need to hunker down and actually work on them. This could actually work.

I keep trying to tell myself this is just a stepping stone to what will be. That maybe this is just going to be a story I can hopefully tell my kids one day. But that’s in an effort to quell this idea that I can actually be successful at this. That I can legitimately make a career out of this. I mean… could I? Maybe I’ll think about that after I’ve finished my next project. Maybe I could actually put my name on this one too! Here’s hoping.

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