Currently – 6/18/19 (Inspiration, Drive, Focus)

Last night a weird thought popped into my head for a book idea. I usually get these a lot but more often than not I just write down a note and try to get back to it later. However this time it was different. I felt like I really had to start on it, like this was the thing that was going to propel me further. I spent around two hours just working on this non stop. The idea just flowed out of me so easily and I couldn’t stop, although I didn’t want to stop.

Still being in between jobs gives me a lot of time. The money situation is annoying but I’m steadily doing other things. Unfortunately I keep spending way too much time playing video games, but now I’m actually being productive so I can give myself a bit of a break. More often than not I’ll work on a project and then a few minutes in feel burnt out and spend hours trying to reset my brain. With this I’m easily spending a full hour or even two just working. I feel like this could actually become something good.

Every so often I’ll have these moments where I really want to push myself. I’ll just feel this drive to move forward that comes out of the blue. Ideally I’d really like to harness that but I’ll settle for just being able to tap into this every so often. Part of me feels like this blog is helping. I’m getting more comfortable with writing in general and doing it almost like a daily activity. Now I’m writing faster and for longer without stopping.

I don’t mind being lazy every so often but only if it comes with the caveat that I’ve actually put some effort into something. Leisure is fine and very important but not if its your baseline. Its good to a take a moment to rest every so often. Resting after working your best feels really great and I’d love to be able to do that more often. I’m sure I’ll be resting more later in life so right now I should really buckle down and give it my all.

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