Currently – 6/10/19 (Job!, Hope, Future)

I’ve been sticking with this blog for mostly just because I want to create a habit of doing it. Its good writing exercise, I get to put all my feelings out there and it feels just nice in general. Most days I wonder what I’m going to write but eventually I just tough it out and write something. Literally like a minute ago, out of the blue I got a call back for a job! I’m really excited and happy and hope that this actually becomes a career.

More than that I think its weird that at the moment it could have gone one of two ways. Usually I don’t answer any call that isn’t a number that I don’t know. I was seconds away from cutting off the call and just missing out on this opportunity. Now that I think about it I wonder how many other opportunities I might have missed out on just by not taking a call or something just as simple. Rationally I know that it probably has never happened but who knows? A random lottery give away? A missed connection with someone I thought wasn’t interested?

Of course I’m just feeling really hopeful. I mean from a strictly monetary sense this job pays more than my old job. Not by much but every little bit counts. All of these things, opportunities and what not, that seemed impossible really are starting to set into place. I was pretty sad to think that I would never be able to go overseas and finally meet my friend but that could change very soon. Wondering how I was going to pay off my bills and now that seems like a distant memory. I keep trying to find the words but all I feel is just hope in general.

Now its less about the day to day more what comes next? It feels like this weight has just been lifted off my shoulders and now I can finally breathe. Simply put I’m really excited for tomorrow and every tomorrow that comes after. And if I’m being honest, I’m glad this situation happened. Losing my job actually helped. Now I’m building skills, thinking further in the future than I ever have. Plus this whole experience of looking for and actually doing the leg work to get a job was something I really needed. Now I just have to put my best foot forward and actually give this job my all.

It feels kind of weird. Like I’m not literally smiling while I’m writing this but it actually feels like I’m smiling inside. Suddenly things don’t seem so bleak. And who knows what could come about from this? This could set my whole life in motion. And to think it came from just a phone call and the smallest chance of me actually answering it. Now more than ever I really, truly feel like moving forward.

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